Wednesday, October 31, 2007

here's the simple play-- short pass... lateral fifteen times... (and win championship)

On the final play of the game, Trinity University (TX) beat Millsaps (MS) 28-24 in the SCAC Div III Championship game last week.

The play started with a simple forward pass followed by 15 laterals. This is unbelievable. Even if you are not a football fan, you will probably like this. To read the USAToday account of the game, click here.

unfortunate name combinations for engaged couples...


if you didn't see another one that was posted at an earlier date, click here.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

living the dream at Lambeau Field.... ?

I consider myself a New England Patriots fan. At least, I did until I came across Wayne Scullino.

Wayne is a Green Bay Packers fan extraordinaire. He has been a Packers fan since he saw a video tape of a Minnesota/Green Bay game back when he was in high school in Sydney, Australia.

In Sydney, the Packers are hardly a household name. But in seasons past, Wayne would rise at 3a.m. so that he could watch the Packers lose ;) via satellite.

That wasn't enough.

This year, Wayne has taken football fandom to a new level. In August, he quit his job with a phone equipment company in Sydney, sold his house and moved his family to Green Bay, WI. He is not currently working because he plans to attend every Packer's game-- at home or away.

Wayne, his wife Kelly, and their two sons (each under 2) are living in an apartment (rented at a low price by a Packers fan), driving a truck (given to him by another Packers fan) and living off the proceeds of the sale of their house.

The Scullinos have never lived in snow. They have never been without a paycheck. They may have nothing by the time they return to Australia. They don't have tickets to all the games. But they are living a dream... freezing at Lambeau Field in Wisconsin. If you would like to check their blog click here.

http://www.fdlreporter.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070909/FON0101/70909031/1288/FON01

I don't know whether I feel inspired by his story or think he is a "few yards shy of a first down." :) Either way, it is a good story and I wish them the best.

one person's trash is another person's ash


What I want to know is why were they in the trash to begin with? It couldn't have been something they said...

Monday, October 29, 2007

attack of the flammable squirrel

I have heard of people who had their car ruined by:
  • a deer jumping on the hood

  • the side of a building falling on it

  • a lightning striking it

  • a sinkhole swallowing it

  • a river washing it away
However, Lindsey and Tony Millar of Bayonne, NJ recently lost their car in a brand new way: an incendary squirrel attack.

One day last week, Lindsey and Tony came home for lunch and parked their Toyota Camry. Apparently, a grey squirrel was having lunch too-- happily chewing on overhead powerlines.

The squirrel bit through the wires and immediately caught itself on fire. The electrical jolt also caused the now-flaming squirrel to fall on the hood of the Millar's car.

The squirrel-torch somehow made its way into the engine compartment of the car where it set the whole thing on fire. The car and poor squirrel went up in a blaze of glory. The car then blew up.

The Millar's car is a total loss. Fortunately, they are insured against incendary squirrels.

The Millar's house is decorated for Halloween-- complete with a plastic tombstone on their front lawn. They are considering dedicating the tombstone to the Flame.

the season has ended.

In honor of the 2007 World Champion Red Sox, I post these baseball bloopers. :)

Friday, October 26, 2007

bury me with my cell phone... my whole cell phone


Arso Banjeglav loved his cell phone. He spent hours every day chatting with his friends and sending text messages to them.

He said he felt lost without his beloved phone and told his son that, should he die, he wanted to be buried with his cell phone at his side.

Well, Arso died recently at the age of 67. As per his request, his son, Brano, placed his father's cell phone in the coffin.

It was a lovely ceremony.

Unfortunately, without anyone realizing it, Arso's 10-year-old grandson was playing with the phone and took out the SIM card.

"We put the phone in the coffin as he wanted, but my 10-year-old son had been playing with it and had taken the card out without my knowledge" said Brano.

"So now, we have got to dig him up again to put it in the phone."

Efforts are underway to exhume the coffin so that the SIM can be reinserted.

No sweat, reception down there is crappy anyhow.
um.... Did you remember the charger?
I'm thinking that Arso ain't missing that SIM card.

URL expired? here is a cached backup

scary and amazing unicyclist Kris Holmes

(the sound is annoying but this guy is worth the watch...)

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

pantless man uses leprechaun defense

Last Tuesday (October 16) Mr. Kim Leblanc broke into a car that was parked on the Central Parkway in Cincinnati, Ohio. Apparently he intended to steal the car, but promptly fell asleep after breaking in.

A short time later, the owner of the car was surprised to find a sleeping man in his car... and who also wasn't wearing any pants. So, he called the police.

When police arrested Mr. Lablanc, he admitted he had been using drugs and had no explanation for his missing pants. However, according to him, he should not be accused of breaking into the car, because he was let into the car by a leprechaun.

An interesting defense, but not unique. According to metro.co.uk, a similar incident happened in Northern Ireland when a man blamed a bad elf for making him rob a lingerie store.

Mr. Leblanc faces charges.

if they can nab that dang leprechaun, Mr. Leblanc will be off the hook... and maybe recover his pants

story

think you are good at tetris? guess again. this is nuts.



if you are a skeptic like me, you may suspect that this has been sped-up. Not so. If you look, there is a clock counting down seconds on the screen.

If you actually want to watch the whole thing... he goes even faster at the end. :)

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

unfortunate airport codes?

Some time ago, I read the true story of a woman who called her travel agent and was irate because she had been offended by the airline ticket agent at the airport.

"Is it normal to have ticket agents put tags that describe you on your luggage??" she asked.

After discussing it with her travel agent, they discovered the problem. The woman's trip destination was Fresno, California.

What is odd about that? The woman's bags had been tagged with tickets bearing the 3-letter airport designation code for Fresno... which happens to be FAT.

(That is why at our home, we sometimes refer to weight gain as "moving to Fresno" and to extra pounds as "living in Fresno." :) )

Anyhow... a new development in that area--

It seems that Sioux Gateway Airport in Sioux City, Iowa was given the letter code of SUX.

Twice, they have petitioned the FAA to change the letters for obvious reasons. The FAA offered them: GWU, GYO, GYT, SGV and GAY as alternatives.

However, after discussing the possibilities, Sioux City decided to keep their designation and turn it into a marketing campaign. You can now order your "Fly Sux" gear at the airport's website: http://www.flysux.com/

Hey, how about a round trip from Sioux City to Fresno? FAT SUX and then, SUX FAT.

for story click here
to validate that Fresno Terminal is indeed FAT, click here

kid map genius... not funny, but this kid is amazing...

You will get the idea after about a minute. BUT... if you want to be humiliated by how much this kid knows, watch the whole thing. :)


Monday, October 22, 2007

95-year-old woman grows horn

This is about as weird (and gross) as it gets... so odd, I wanted to verify it from two sources (and did).

Xiou Ling, a woman from Zhangiang, China has developed a 4.7 inch (12cm) horn on her forehead.

The horn first appeared in 2003 and has gotten progressively bigger. Doctors think it may have something to do with a hormone imbalance.

The 95-year-old woman is saving money for treatment and removal.

(don't study the picture too long. it will stick in your mind and you will think about it all day. trust me. :) )

http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=69680&in_page_id=2
http://www.livenews.com.au/Articles/2007/10/11/95_year_old_woman_grows_horn_from_forehead

brilliance personified on The People's Court

Friday, October 19, 2007

skydiver survives parachute accident

slow-motion get away

If you had $800 to bet, who would you put your money on to win a two-mile footrace?

- 2 men carrying bags of coins weighing 132 pounds
or
- 100 police officers carrying nothing in their hands.

Last week, two Chinese men in Beijing robbed a hotel for $800 in coins. The hotel kept the money on hand to exchange for its guests. The bags weighed 132 lbs (60 kilograms).

Unfortunately, the men didn't plan their escape very well, because their hideout was nearly two miles away and they had no car, bike, bus or rickshaw. So, the footrace was on.

The men gave it their best shot. Spectators said that they were "sweating profusely" as they tried to outrun more than 100 policemen through the city streets.

As expected, they lost the race. But they will be remembered for staging one of the worst-planned robbery get-aways of all time.

Interestingly, the chase lasted 1.8 miles. Do Chinese policemen frequent donut shops???

http://news.scotsman.com/latest_odd.cfm?id=1618092007

barbeque bought... leg found... part four

Update:

You may recall I reported the story of the man who found a human leg in his barbeque (click link).

The next step... the owner of the leg will be decided by a TV Judge: Judge Mathis.
(I will try to post the airing date when I see it).

http://www.usatoday.com/news/offbeat/2007-10-10-amputated-leg_N.htm?csp=34

okay, what do I do now?

this was an actual dialog box that popped up in Lotus Notes:











http://worsethanfailure.com/Articles/Do-Not-Click!.aspx

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

missing something between his ears...

Stelios Arcadiou (aka Stelarc) is an "artist" who is known for his artistic idiosyncrasies. His performances often use robotics integrated with his body.

For example, in 25 performances he hung himself on a flesh hook with robotics attached. Another time, he attached muscle stimulating electrodes to himself and allowed his body to be controlled via the internet.

Now, Arcadiou has a new idiosyncrasy: a third ear that has been attached to his right forearm. The ear was not donated. Rather, it was created in a lab from cells and cartilage.

Arcadiou, 61, spent years trying to find a surgeon who would do the procedure. (apparently arm, ears, nose and throat specialists are hard to find)

The ear, of course, is not functional. However, Arcadiou hopes to have a microphone implanted in it so that others can listen to what his ear picks up.

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_2549709.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7039821.stm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stelarc

Some doctors have ethical issues with this procedure, but Arcadiou turns a deaf ear to them.
(I actually feel sorry for him... he will be the only man in the world wanting to buy three earmuffs.)

once in a lifetime opportunity: only while supplies last



ummmmm... could I have the cream filling reinstalled?

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

now we need more than an oil change

Fake cop stops real cop.

Have you ever had someone cut you off in traffic... and wished you could teach that idiot a lesson by giving him a ticket?

If you ever are inclined to do that, take this advice from Robert Lane:

1. Don't do it.

2. If you are stupid enough to try, don't pull over a cop.

This summer, Robert Lane, 25, said that he was "cut off" by another driver on a Long Island expressway.

He wanted to teach the guy a lesson... so, he turned on some blue flashers he had installed on the front of his car, pulled up alongside the other driver and flashed his "badge."

The man was an off duty detective who immediately recognized that Lane's badge was fake. So, he flashed his real badge back at Mr. Lane and motioned him to pull over.

Mr. Lane did not immediately comply, but when he was tracked down and caught, he was arrested for impersonating an officer.

story: http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=56979&in_page_id=2

lesson for us all to learn: if you go to the trouble of installing blue lights on your car, at least pony-up for a decent looking badge. :)

Monday, October 15, 2007

some are born to greatness, some grow it.

Wes Pemberton noticed it one day when he was in the car with his daughter. At first, he thought it belonged to someone else. Then, he realized that it was his.

Now, he tenderly cares for it. Each day he washes it, conditions it and tenderly (oh, so tenderly) dries it.

He thinks it is cool and wonderful. His wife thinks it is weird and is embarrassed by it.

Recently, it has placed him in the national news. He can be seen with it on YouTube. Soon, it will put him into the Guiness Book of World Records.

What is it? What is this amazing thing?

A single hair.
One 5-inch hair attached firmly to his left leg. It happens to be the longest hair ever found on a human leg. It exceeds the old record by .12 inches.

Once he is confirmed for the Book of World Records, Wes plans to cut off the hair and attach it to his certificate.

Wes, a medical student who lives in Texas, is proud of his hair. And he should be. ;)

http://www.kltv.com/Global/story.asp?S=7190593
video
will he be disqualified from the record book if they find he used hair enhancement drugs?

he got my attention, but I can't understand a word he says





(This not a paintshop job. He is an ascetic living in India.)

whatever he is trying to do, I sure hope it works for him! :)

Friday, October 12, 2007

dentures in the news (?)

In case you missed it, false teeth have been in the news twice lately.

The first story comes from York Towne, DE, where Robert Henry Stahl, 62, is charged with stealing a man's false teeth right out of his head.

It seems Mr. Stahl met Billie Townsend, 56, at a bar. Mr. Townsend owed Mr. Stahl some money and didn't want to pay. So, outside the bar, Stahl got Townsend in a headlock and took his false teeth. He is quoted as saying "You ain't getting these back."

He was true to his word. Mr. Stahl kept the teeth and now has been charged with robbery and battery. He could face up to eight years in prison.

(giving new meaning to the slogan "take a bite out of crime.")

The second false teeth story comes from Wellington, New Zeland where an unnamed patient lost his false teeth during surgery.

Fortunately, they found the teeth four days later.

Unfortunately, they found them in his throat.

The man complained about extreme pain in his throat following surgery. Nurses noticed that his voice was "husky" and he couldn't eat much. Using a laryngoscope, doctors found the problem... and removed his upper plate from his throat.

(good thing he wasn't getting a colonoscopy)


I always remember what one of my college profs told me: be true to your teeth and they will never be false to you

I always do. Why the warning?


I especially like the graphic in the lower left with the penguin next to the car... and under the car.

kung fu... just struck me as funny :)

Thursday, October 11, 2007

not your smartest counterfeiter

If you are going to do something weird, might as well do it big.

Last Saturday, a man went into the Giant Eagle supermarket in Pittsburgh to pick up a few groceries.

When he went to pay, the clerk noticed something unusual about the money he gave her: it was a $1 million bill with the picture of President Grover Cleveland on it.

When the clerk refused the "money," the man got upset. He smashed an electronic payment machine and then tried to grab the scanner gun.

Perhaps a little research would have helped. The largest US bill currently in circulation is the $100 bill (since 1969). The largest bill ever produced by the US government was a $100,000 bill (1934). They were used only by the Treasury Department and never circulated.

The Mastermind is being held in the Allegheny County Jail.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21202403/
http://www.treas.gov/education/faq/currency/denominations.shtml

He will probably have plenty of time to count his change in the coming weeks.

order while supplies last

originally shown on CVN which was purchased by QVC

Ladder Collapses On Dude

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

the 7 Random Things meme

I have been "tagged" by Amy with the 7 Random Things meme. Being new to this blog community thing, I had to investigate what that means... and what a meme is.

I learned that it means that I am supposed to post seven things about myself that are unknown by my readers. Then, I am to tag three others.

Well, heck. This oughta be easy since most of the people who read this blog probably don't even know my last name. (I could also post just a bunch of fiction (aka lies) an no one would ever be the wiser.)

But in the spirit of this thing, I will post 7 things that are actually true of me and maybe worth reading:

7. My old cat's name: Fido. Well, that isn't true. We decided to make it more cultured so we spelled it Phydeaux.

6. When I was 4 years old, I got glasses. At the time, my optometrist told my mother that I would outgrow them by the time I was a teenager. I am now a man in my fifties waiting for puberty.

5. I have a tattoo. Yes, that is right. It is a tiny dot on my right hand from where I was stabbed by a very sharp pencil that stuck in deep. The tattoo has been there now for more than 30 years and I cherish it.

4. People tell me I have a sarcastic sense of humor. Yeah, right. Jerks. ;)

3. I was once at a concert. When the performers on stage came to a rest in the music, the entire audience was quiet. Well, except for the gas that I passed at that moment. It was quite loud. At least it didn't smell like brocolli.

2. I learned an important lesson while riding my bicycle on a very cold day. That is, lips will adhere to handlebars quite securely if you kiss your bike in freezing weather. I am glad lips grow back.

1. I have learned that it is important to zip my fly if I am going to be speaking in public wearing a black suit... especially if I am wearing a white shirt and/or white underwear.

And now, I am supposed to tag three others and bequeath to them this same task. I really would love to tag Amy back. But instead, I choose to tag Kjaere of Licence2Rant, Robert at MulledVine, and Michelle at Online Shopping Bargains. That, my friends, is what you get for writing to me. :)

following my story (above), I applied.


Tuesday, October 9, 2007

should have read the ad first


in case you can't read it, the sign on the side of the bus happens to say,
"If you don't have GIO Third Party Property Insurance, we suggest you don't hit this bus."

how to get noticed by the new boss

It started out as a nice gesture. A 31-year-old Japanese man gave a gift to his new employer to show his appreciation for landing a job.

He was glad for his new job at an online clothing seller. To express his gratitude, he gave his boss an assortment of jelly deserts.

Unfortunately, the boss was just too busy to open the gift and kept it stored under his desk, unopened.

Since the man apparently didn't attract the notice of his boss with the gift, he decided to take a sure-fire approach: he took a club and smashed 22 computers in his office.

In explanation of his actions, the man said simply, "I wish the company president had cared a little more."

No one was injured. The man pleaded guilty to obstructing business with force.


I wonder if he can get the jellies back.

Monday, October 8, 2007

lessons on taking medications (that you maybe oughta know)

True story: a woman went to her doctor and complained because her prescription "wasn't working."

The doctor was perplexed because it was the second medication that "didn't work." So, naturally, he asked, "Are you following the instructions that are on the bottle?"

At that point, the woman's husband responded, "yes, I am."

"What??? You are taking the prescription??? It is her medicine."

The husband explained that he was taking the prescription for her because "she doesn't like to take pills."

...I told my pharmacist that story, she told me this thing that happened to her:

One mother came to her and noted that her child's medication wasn't working. The medication was a suppository... and apparently, it just wasn't dissolving as it should.

After discussing it with the pharmacist, the mother was surprised to learn that she needed to take the pills out of the blister wrap before inserting.

arggggg. poor kid. Not only was his medication not working (for obvious reasons) but the edges of the blister wrap...

The moral? What is obvious to one person isn't always obvious to another. (or... some people are a few fries short of a Happy Meal.)

I suppose we should be glad that the pills weren't in a bottle.

Friday, October 5, 2007

finally. comments are available.

yeeeshhhhhhhhh. see the time stamp on this post???

I had some readers express a wish to leave comments. So... after hours of investigating and learning stuff I never knew... I finally got the comments working on this page (I think).

(I had to change the template... and I don't know html very well at all. )

Anyhow... I'd love to hear from you. Have a great weekend.

barbecue bought... leg found... man found... lawsuit threatened... weird news that came in three installments

Last week, Shannon Whisnant of Maiden, SC purchased a barbecue smoker at an auction... he wasn't bargaining for what was inside.

When he got it home and opened the smoker, he thought that he found a piece of driftwood wrapped in newspaper. When he unwrapped it, he found a human leg that had been cut off 3 inches above the knee.

The leg was taken to the police who determined that the leg was not removed in the commission of a crime. They handed it over to a local funeral home and began to look for the man with a missing leg.

They found him. His name is John Wood of Greenville, SC. Mr. Wood's leg was removed back in 2004. Rather than having it discarded, he kept it at a storage facility inside the smoker. (Why? because someday he wants to be buried whole.)

Unfortunately, Mr. Wood didn't pay the storage facility, so they sold the smoker at public auction... not knowing that it included a leg. That is when Mr. Whisnant purchased it.

Of course, Mr. Wood wants his leg back.

Not so fast. Mr. Whisnant is the owner of the leg. He has a receipt to prove it.

Being an astute businessman, he realized that he could make some money on the leg. After all, he was charging adults $3 and children $1 to look inside the empty barbecue. Just imagine what he could make if the leg were still in it!

He offered to share joint custody of the leg with Mr. Wood... but Mr. Wood wanted nothing to do with it. So, Mr. Whisnant threatened a lawsuit.

As of last report, authorities say the leg will be returned to Mr. Wood. After all, he grew it.

This story unfolded throughout this week... here are the progressive links
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20982414/
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7024124.stm
http://www.local6.com/news/14266769/detail.html

I hope Mr. Wisnant is generous, because legally, Mr. Wood doesn't have a leg to stand on.

lifeguard takes a break


-

from the police log...


Thursday, October 4, 2007

the $80K exterminator

What is worse than wasps infesting your home?

Not much. Wasps can make life in your home quite uncomfortable and painful. That is why Hugh Williams of Triad, North Carolina took action.

Mr. Williams' home had an infestation of yellow jackets. To take care of the problem, he purchased a can of insecticide and sprayed it into the insect's hole on the side of the house.

It didn't work.

So, Mr. Williams rolled up a piece of paper and stuck it in the hole. Then, he lit the paper, hoping to kill the buggers with smoke.

He succeeded. He burned them out. Unfortunately, the combination of paper and chemical created a fire that spread through the attic and into the house.

The yellow jackets no longer live in the attic because it doesn't exist. Neither does most of the house.... And Mr. Williams is trying to figure out how he will come up with $80,000 to cover the damage he inflicted on his home.


he knew what to do... thanks to TV



good thing he didn't have any of that cheap paper towel

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

conference bathroom


it wasn't my plan to be thematic today!

stuck on a toilet seat: part deux

Back in 2003, Bob Dougherty of Nederland, Colorado was the victim of a prank. While visiting his local Home Depot store, he visited the men's room. He did his business... but when it tried to rise, he found himself securely glued to the toilet seat.

Eventually, he was unglued by firefighters and parametics. He passed out as he had strips of skin removed from his posterior so that his posterior could be removed from the toilet.

He sued Home Depot and got a settlement.

Four years passed.

Last month, Mr. Dougherty was taken to the hospital suffering from abnormally low blood sugar. He slipped into a coma for a time. He is recovering.

How are these incidents related, you ask?

Mr Dougherty has filed another lawsuit against Home Depot claiming that the glue-incident of 2003 gave him post-traumatic stress syndrome which, in turn, has led to his being a diabetic.

In short, he is suing Home Depot for his diabetes (and related expenses) because four years ago, an unknown prankster glued him to a toilet seat.

Home Depot has filed a counter suit to have the charges dropped.

As a sidenote, another county official has come forward claiming that Mr. Doughtery claims to have been "glued" to another toilet seat in 2004. Hmmmmm.... does he have really bad luck, or do we have a possible "serial gluee?"

http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=68492&in_page_id=2

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

we need to talk to that new activities director.

the grass is always greener....

Sana and Adnan Klaric of central Bosnia had been married for a several years but found their marriage was less than a dream-come-true.

Feeling unfulfilled, Sana started visiting Internet chatrooms and met "Princ Radosti." They began an online relationship. They shared their hearts and hurts. They discussed their deepest thoughts and dreams.

They also found that had something in common: each had an unhappy marriage.

Said Sana, "I was suddenly in love again. It was beautiful, I thought I finally found someone who understands me..."

She believed that Princ Radosti was indeed her prince. She wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. He assured her that he felt the same way.

So, they chose a time and place to finally meet in person.

On the day they met, Sana was shocked. Princ Radosti was also shocked. It seems that they were already married... to each other.

Without realizing it, Sana and Adnan Klaric had been cheating on each other with each other.

Each immediately accused the other of infidelity. They filed for divorce.

http://www.int.iol.co.za/index.php?from=rss_News&set_id=1&click_id=79&art_id=nw20070919224928223C739159

now that she is divorced, do ya think she'll marry Princ Radosti?

Monday, October 1, 2007

strangest accident I've seen


Crash - For more of the funniest videos, click here

Think of it as a first-floor sun roof.

Rodney Rogers of Greenfield, Ohio was looking forward to moving into his new home.

The gentleman's agreement with the builder was that after the house was complete, Mr. Rogers would buy the house. In the meantime, the builder would be allowed to live in the house while he was constructing it.

Everything went as expected until the house was finished. Apparently, the builder liked his own work so well that he decided to stay... and not sell to Mr. Rogers.

Ahhhhhhhh. What to do? Here's an interesting attempt at conflict resolution:

The 60-year-old Rogers took a power saw and cut the house horizontally in half. Making a chest-high 360-degree swath around the house, he gave new definition to "split-level."

According to Highland County Sherrif, Ronald Ward, the only thing that was keeping the top half of the house in place is "gravity."

There is no estimate on damages yet. (yes, that is a picture of the house)

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20996503/

Mr. Rogers, please won't you be my neighbor?